There will always be bullies in this world. I know, that is not what I am expected to say on this first day of the New Year. I should be optimistic that we will somehow be able to appeal to the better nature in all people and try to walk in each others shoes, to show compassion, tolerance and empathy. But unfortunately, I do not believe that will ever be the case. Some people will always take pleasure in tormenting those they perceive as different. I believe some people need to criticize and judge others and by doing so they feel better about themselves. The thing they do not seem to realize that if circumstances were different for them, they may very well be in the exact situation they are so critical of and that it is only luck that separates us.
A case in point...
I have an aunt, who is more like a sister to me. I have watched over the years as others have treated her poorly, stared at her, become intolerant of her slowness. She is a downs syndrome child of God and has taught me lessons that the best preacher could not impart. At my grandmother’s insistence, we attended kindergarten together. I thought nothing of this at the time. Small children seem to have the capacity to see the humanity in others, even if they are different, and do not seem even to notice the differences. It was only a matter of weeks before the teacher approached my grandmother and insisted Carla was not advanced enough to keep up with the other children. My grandmother was heart-broken, I was confused. Carla however, took it all in stride, and easily adapted to the situation and became very popular among her peers at her new school.
Over time, as I began to drive, date and eventually to marry, she did complain to me occasionally, about how unfair she felt it was that I was experiencing these milestones and that she wasn’t allowed the same privileges. She would often say it wasn’t fair because she was older than me (by one year). Still, she was, for the most part, a very positive person, only becoming upset when someone referred to her as retarded. “I am not retarded.” she would state. It hurt her deeply and I still cringe today when a person calls someone else “retard.” My children, who have grown up knowing and loving this special person, have benefited greatly in their relationship with her and I am proud to say that they have frequently stood up for those who are picked on due to their different looks, intellect, viewpoints, religion, sexual identity or for any other reason.
The reason I am writing about this topic this morning is that my dear Carla is currently in the hospital and is suffering from early onset Alzheimer’s. While it is true she was never treated fairly in this world, she continues, even in her fog, to have the sweetest disposition of anyone I have ever met.
This one's for you Carlina. You are our angel girl who rises above. You are loved.
I am currently working on a somewhat darker piece that further expresses my take on the bullying that occurs on so many levels in this world and hope to present it here by weeks end. In the meantime I have been pondering this years resolutions and they are to write more, read more, post often and above all to grow as an artist and as an individual.
